A Day Away, A Haircut, and Crawl

Life has certainly been a juggling act lately, with not nearly enough time for working in the studio. I try really hard to spend those days I'm not working or busy with outside appointments in the studio...but sometimes a day away refuels the creative fire more than anything else can.

Last week I had a day just like that. I left home in the morning and didn't make it home till bedtime. It was a day spent with artsy friends and even time all to myself. I had time to catch my breath, treat myself just a little and just enjoy being away from the pressures of life in general. It was the kind of escape we all need once in a while.

I started off the morning by meeting with my mentor, Brenna Busse, to take a trip to Circa Gallery in downtown Minneapolis to check out the Barbara Gilhooly show that is there till the end of this month. Barbara was a Lowertown artist (she moved this past summer) that still exhibits locally. I love her work and this show was inspiring--to both Brenna and myself. For one thing, I was just amazed by how productive she is as an artist. A large chunk of the exhibit included 100 6x6 paintings--all completed this winter, I believe. Even if they were small--that's a lot of work. They were painted on birch wood panels. Part of what I liked about them was how she built layers upon layers of color, carved into the wood and even used sandpaper to reveal multiple layers of paint. 

Seeing a show like that makes you want to run right home, lock yourself in the studio and get busy. But then I remembered ... this was my day.

I said good-bye to Brenna and made a call to see if I could make an afternoon appointment for a hair cut. I've been dreaming of a new cut for a couple of weeks. I felt the need to get rid of some hair. Really. On so many levels, I just needed to get it cut off. It felt too long, too bushy, too everything. And I felt like a new hairdo would put me in a spring-sort of mood. I've just had enough of  snow and winter (I had to wipe snow off my windshield that very morning, damnit) and even if it didn't look like spring outside, I needed to feel like it inside. And hooray, I got an appointment with a new person who finally gave me the short haircut that I've been wanting to get for the past year (there were several failed attempts). I left the salon feeling like a new woman. I got my sassy back.


From there I met up with one of my WARM buddies...we hung out, talked art until it was time to go to our very first Critical Response for two of our fellow Protegees. I think I will write about this more in-depth at a later date, but basically it is a process developed by dancer Liz Lerman for artists to give one another feedback about their work that supports the artist rather than tear them down. (I do not have fond memories of critiques in college many years ago). It was an interesting experience. It definitely felt good to connect with other artists and experience a "critique" that could be both supportive and informative. 


It's been several days now, but the experiences of this one day are still swimming around in my head. I want to spend time in the studio and work on the projects in my head...and while I have done some painting, what I'm really focused on is getting things ready for the Art Crawl. Bigger projects will have to wait, cause the Crawl is next weekend!

I'm not quite sure how it's all going to come together, but I just keep going. I've made my lists, keep finishing things on those lists, and know that somehow it will all get done (more or less) and I'll be ready for another Crawl.

I'll let you know how it goes.

Surviving the deep freeze

I've been trying to survive the deep freeze here in Minnesota. It's hard to find the desire to leave your warm, cozy home when you wake up to temps well below zero (-16 degrees Thursday morning). While I've enjoyed some days within the shelter of our home, settling in our new place, I've also been brave and ventured out. 

Thursday I had my first meeting with my WARM mentor, Brenna. I got to show her my new working space and share with her more of my artwork and my life story behind the work. 

The past few days have included more WARM-related activities...Friday I met with my small group that includes two other protegees that are working with Brenna. The three of us (still trying to come up with a name for our group) will be meeting on a regular basis, offering each other feedback and support. 

And then today I attended the Protegee Tea for all the protegees participating in this two-year cycle. There are 19 of us. Some of us have met at different events leading up to this kickoff to the program, but this was our first formal event as a group. It was nice to meet and get to know a little better the artists that I will share this whole experience with.

This week the weather is supposed to warm up a bit. After this past week, temps in the 20's will feel like a heatwave! It's funny how we psyche ourselves into believing it's "not that bad". We even try to convince ourselves that with January coming to a close, winter is almost over. Ha! There's still a good few months of cold and snow...but it's at least the half-way point, right?

   

pictures taken following our December blizzard

Writing a work plan...

I wrote my work plan at the computer with my kitty looking on. 

My first assignment for the WARM Mentor program was to write a work plan. Basically, it is an outline of the work I plan to do in the two years of the program. It spells out my goals, what steps I plan to take to reach those goals... Things will change no doubt, but this work plan will provide the framework as I begin the program.

Each protegee had to meet with their new mentor and review their plan. The work plan needed to be turned in December 8th. 

It was a challenging task. There is something about speaking our dreams out loud that is very powerful. It becomes even more powerful when you make a step by step guide for how you plan to achieve those dreams. It makes it more real.

I'll admit that I was initially a little vague on a few points. And there were some dreams that I wasn't quite ready to put down on paper. But then I met with Brenna and it all came tumbling out...the dream of showing my work at outside venues and even having a solo show.  There are a lot of steps from here to there, including writing an artist statement and resume...but I feel I am headed in the right direction.


I have also started meeting with two of the other protegees. All three of us will be working with Brenna (as our mentor). It has been fun and energizing to meet with other artists who are at the same place I am. Over the next two years the three of us plan to meet as a small group...throwing out support to one another while also challenging each other!


I feel like my life will be filled with much change over the next few years...I'm not sure how some things will shake out, but I feel that by participating in the WARM program I am taking some very positive steps in my art career.  I am open to all the possibilities. No doubt there are times when I wish I had a little crystal ball and could see into the future...but what fun would there be in that?

And my WARM mentor is...

Several weeks ago I wrote here with excitement about learning who my WARM mentor would be these next two years. I wanted to share with you then who the artist is, but I also felt I should wait to share her name until I cleared it with her. Well, weeks have past and I have met with her and now I can share my great fortune! I will be working with mixed media figure artist Brenna Busse. I have admired her work for several years. I am sharing pics of one of her pieces that I bought as a birthday present for my dear friend Julie. You can check out more images of her work at her website or if you're in the area, the Grand Hand Gallery carries her work.

Brenna creates her pieces using a variety of materials...clay, fiber, and often,  materials found in nature, such as sticks and stones. I had picked this piece out for Julie before I even knew Brenna would be my mentor. Brenna wrote this about her work (taken from her website):

"My intention is to communicate and inspire. Using materials as metaphor; I share my celebration of the beauty of nature, faith in possibility and the sacred quality of daily life…"

During Julie's visit, we were able to visit Brenna during her recent show at Ramsey.

me, Julie, and Brenna

I will start the mentor program, with Brenna as my guide, in January. I have met with her just twice--first, for the interview and then most recently, we met to review my work plan. Each time that we have met I leave energized and with a clearer vision of what it is I want to work on. Brenna asks good questions and perhaps even more importantly, she is a good listener. I am sure I will learn much and grow even more.

Next up: my work plan!

The long wait is over!

a small abstract I recently finished--see note below

Late Thursday evening, after several days of being on "e-mail watch", I received the long (in my eyes) awaited e-mail with the list of Mentor-Protegee pairings for the WARM Mentor Program. I opened the e-mail with anxious enthusiasm. I quickly scanned the list to find my name and the name of the mentor that I will work with for the next two years.

I am over the moon excited to be working with an artist whose work I have admired for several years (I've decided that I will clear it with her before I give you her name and website information, so you can check out her wonderful work). I will say that she is an amazing woman with much creative energy. She has a deep understanding of the creative process and how making art can be part of a healing process. I am looking forward to working with her. I can't wait to get started (the program doesn't officially start until January).

I feel as if I am at the beginning of a journey. I am not quite sure where this journey will lead me. The unknown is not really scaring me, but exciting me. I feel that this is a beginning filled with possibilities. Much will change, no doubt, but I am open to those changes. 

For now, I am writing my preliminary "work plan" for the program. Already it is interesting work, as I identify my goals and what helps me achieve those goals and on the flip side, what gets in my way.

I am also looking forward to meeting the other protegees and all the mentors. This will be a community of women artists that I will be very involved with in the next few years. I have a strong sense that friendships will be formed that will remain intact long past the two years of the program. At least, that is my hope.

So here we go, on this amazing adventure!



About the artwork above--This is a small abstract that I recently finished. I was trying some new techniques and created this piece on a 9x12 cradled artist board. 

My first step was to apply a layer of crackle paste on the board. This was the first time I had worked with the crackle paste and even though I thought I had applied a thick layer, it really wasn't quite thick enough to get the affect that I was aiming for. It's hard to see the affects of the crackle paste in this photo, because the cracks are on the fine side.  

After I applied the crackle paste, I had to allow it to dry 24 hours before I could start the painting process. The crackle paste creates an interesting surface to work on, as you can achieve different affects depending on how wet or dry you keep the surface. 

If you want to try crackle paste, I would recommend checking out Golden's website, which includes a video about the product. I think I will work with crackle paste again...perhaps on a larger surface next time. 

Now I am working on a piece using Golden's Glass Bead Gel. I'll let you know how that works out!

Catching my breath!

I am taking this evening to catch my breath and pamper myself just a bit. Today I had my third and final interview for the WARM mentor program. Each interview was outstanding in so many ways. Although at the onset, the interview process loomed before me as intimidating, now with the interviews behind me, I look at the interviews as invigorating, informative, and interesting on so many levels. 

I learned much about myself as an artist. The process allowed me to see the progress that I've made in the past few years. I left each interview feeling more accomplished than I generally see myself as. I still have much work to do (always will), but I can look ahead with confidence.

And I have renewed energy for my painting...not that it was really waning...but I'm feeling a burst of energy about working on new pieces. Such a good feeling to carry into the studio!

I have two weeks to wait before I learn who I will be matched with. Interviews are still underway for two more weeks. I'm glad I'm done and will be painting away to pass the time! Hopefully the time will fly by!

So tonight I am planning an evening to unwind. I made an awesome dinner...a pasta dish with chicken and thai peanut sauce. I may bake some oatmeal cookies...with dried cherries and chocolate chips (I've been sooo domestic lately...baked pumpkin pies this weekend). And before bed, I plan to soak in the tub with some fragrant bath salts. Aah...

And tomorrow...it's back to the studio!

Leap of Faith

Allow me to apologize for being a bit scarce around here lately...I've been in sort of a deep cleaning mode, at home and at the studio. I finally cleaned up this little sitting area in a little corner of our bedroom. The chairs have been there for ages, but tend to be the dumping ground for clothes and what not. The whole idea has been to have this space near the windows where hubby and I can sit to talk, read, or just watch the river.

I suppose it is a good time for fall cleaning, but I think this little bout of cleaning is just as much about me working through this transition in my life. I'm not done yet, but I'm making headway. I was finally ready to go through some papers and other items I brought home when I left my job five months ago (in some ways, I feel my job left me). It has felt too emotionally charged to do it any sooner. I had to leave things set a bit, so I could separate myself from these things. But it was time. As I sorted through these things, I packed some things away, found new places for other things, and tossed a whole lot out. With every bag I tossed away, my spirit felt a little free-er to move on.

So much of life is filled with uncertainty...the unknown. It can scare you, if you let it. Believe me, I have those days. But the only way I have made it through the past five months is by embracing the unknown as possibility and adventure. I won't lie...I feel uncertain and even scared at times. But there is also a part of me that has seen this layoff as a gift, a rare opportunity to explore other options for my life.

It's not easy to stay in that place. I sometimes have to keep myself from falling into a perpetual state of panic or despair. But because I am trying to look at this time as a gift, I have been a bit bolder and ready to take a leap of faith...in myself.

The cool thing is that my hubby is doing the same. In the past five months, he has reignited his passion for acting. He's been running all over town, going on auditions, taking parts in student films, answering calls for film extras... And it is beginning to pay off...he has a lead role in a community theater production and is getting more and more calls for some paying gigs (it's nice to be compensated sometimes!).

Last night as we were recounting some of our recent exploits to my son, he quipped, You are one artsy couple."  Ya, we are...and quite happy pursuing our dreams.

My leap of faith is all about taking myself more seriously as an artist and being bold enough to declare myself just that, an artist. I am working hard to commit more time to my art, to challenge myself as an artist and grow.

And so, I feel ready to take advantage of this gift and use it as an opportunity to participate in a program that I think will make me a stronger artist. A little over a month ago, I wrote about the WARM mentor program. Over the past month, I have attended a couple mentor introduction sessions. I am just starting the process of interviewing with possible mentors.

Interview...the very word is anxiety-producing. Yesterday, before my first interview, I was about as nervous as I could get. That negative critical voice inside my head was working overtime, with fears of not being good enough. It was no easy task to quiet that little monster.

Thankfully, five minutes into the "interview" I had calmed down considerably and was, for the most part, able to enjoy this incredible opportunity to review my work with a more experienced artist. It was a wonderful experience. Sometimes it is good to see your work through someone else's eyes. I left feeling my work is stronger than I give myself credit for...and I felt more clarity about what direction I want to go with my work.

I still have two more "interview" experiences...spread out over the next few weeks. Mentors and protegees will be matched when the interview period is completed--November 15th.

In the meantime, I will continue plugging away...and trying to make the best use of this opportunity.

Being Brave...

Force of Nature

I was brave today. I feel I need to pat myself on the back for just a moment.  It might not seem like a BIG deal, but it was for me...so, WAY TO GO, RISA! 

What did I do, you ask? 

Today I went to the informational session for WARM's  Mentor Program. (WARM stands for Women's Art Registry of Minnesota).  Going to that meeting was a big deal for several reasons.

First, I hate walking into things like this--a group setting where I don't know anyone--not my cup of tea...brings out loads of social anxiety. Hubby dropped me off and I sort of felt like a kid being dropped off for the first day of school. I was about ten minutes early and the first one there (which I prefer). I found my way to the meeting room and was greeted by the program coordinator. After that I was fine...it's just those first few moments that cause my anxiety.

But going to this meeting was also a big deal because participating in this program is something I've thought about for a long time...and going to the meeting brought me one step closer to realizing this dream. The opportunity only comes around every two years. Here's a brief description of the program (taken from their website)--

The WARM Mentor Program is a supportive resource that pairs emerging and professional women artists for two years. Each protégée directs the process of selecting her mentor, identifying her goals and tracking her progress. Mentors share wisdom and skills while providing supportive critique.

The WARM Mentor Program was founded to ensure that women are full participants in the development of the visual arts and culture in their communities and society. The Mentor Program is designed for the serious artist who is in the early stage of her career. Each participant pairs with a professional woman artist or mentor for a two-year term.  The next cycle begins in January 2011.

The informational meeting fueled my enthusiasm for participating as a protegee in this two year program.  As I wrote earlier, I've been interested in this program for a while. I first heard about this program years and years ago...and always kept it on my radar screen, thinking...."it would be nice to do that someday...if I'm ever really doing anything with my art."

Well, baby...I think someday is now. I am not going to allow myself to convince myself otherwise. I am not going to do what I've done in the past...convince myself that this isn't the best time to participate, that I'm not ready...I am ready. I'm never going to be more ready.

Besides having the opportunity to work one-on-one with a more established local artist for two years, I will have the opportunity to build a community with other emerging (as they call the protegees) artists. Even though I am an introvert and have a hard time in those types of group settings (at first), I am definitely feeling the need these days to build a stronger connection to my local artist community.

Just a few days ago I called my long-distance artist friend, Julie, to check in and commiserate...creating art can be a lonely experience and I am missing the daily connections of working with others. Sometimes I feel like I am creating art in a vacuum. And while I am relishing this opportunity to work full-time on my art (and trying to make the most of the opportunity), so much in my life has changed in the past few months and I am still adjusting.

This program looks like just what I need. So I am moving forward in the process and hoping to make this a reality. There are still some hurdles to leap. I will need to submit my application by October 11th and then interview with potential mentors. Then I wait for a mentor to choose to work with me. Perhaps the biggest hurdle for me is the financial committment this program will require. Fees are very modest, but money is certainly tight. I am hoping for some sales during the Art Crawl next month to fund my initial program fees.

If everything falls into place, I will sign the program contract on December 1st...which by the way, is just days from my 50th birthday.

I think that would be an awesome way to kick off my 50th birthday!

So, think good thoughts, keep your fingers crossed or say a prayer...whatever it is you do. 

I'll let you know how things progress.

.