Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Hard Week

This week started with such promise. I had not spent as much time as I hoped in the studio this past weekend, but enough to recharge me. I was feeling a little stuck, but out of the blue on Monday morning--well, at Starbucks really, I was struck with inspiration for one of the paintings I was working on. 

Sometimes inspiration is like're out running errands, talking to a friend, baking cookies, whatever...and you see something or your head clears and new ideas come to you. Totally unexpected, but a delight nonetheless. It's energizing. Motivating.

So off to work I went, caffeinated and ready to breeze thru my work day or so I thought. I couldn't wait to get thru the day and head to the studio and paint that inspired idea out on canvas. But this week has already taken a few twists and turns I wasn't expecting.

First off, and most significantly, my step daughter went in for scheduled surgery on Monday. It should have been a routine procedure. Instead there were complications and nothing seems routine now. Right now her body is trying to mend and needs some time to heal. Hopefully things will look brighter tomorrow. It was/is a reminder that life throws you unexpected curveballs. 

Throw on top of that the stresses of my full-time job as a social worker. Most days I enjoy my job and feel that I am doing something meaningful. I enjoy the relationships that I have with the people I work with. But the past few weeks have felt more difficult. Sometimes it is just plain hard to hear over and over again how difficult life can be for folks...and to feel like there's not much you can do to make things better. Sometimes I just don't have answers and I'm at a loss for how to even be encouraging.

I guess I'm feeling a bit discouraged. And tired. It's hard to come home and feel inspired.

But when life seems hard, art is my solace. Viewing art or making art is a reminder of how beautiful life can be--even when things are rough.

So I try to spend time in my studio. Because there I can relax. Unwind. Disconnect. Create great stuff. It's hard finding the motivation, but once I get to the studio and start working the stress just sort of evaporates and I feel more at ease with the world. I feel good about things again.


simplydelicious said...

I am so sorry that you have had a hard week! My circumstances are somewhat similar to yours and I know how you must be feeling! Your art is beautiful and bright and you should use it to change your state of mind...bury yourself in it if need be. I love the saturation of color on your blog!

XO Karen

pinkglitterfae said...

I can relate to this post...I realized many years ago that you can't save the world. As much as we wish we could help people, it isn't always possible, and it is easy to feel frustrated, and hopeless. Just know that you are doing all you can to help the people you deal with, the rest must be done by them.
Luckily you have art, and are able to take refuge in it. Be in the moment as much as you can, and remember, this too shall pass

risa said...

Thank you for your comments and support. Her recovery continues to go so slow...actually it doesn't feel like things are getting better yet...I keep hoping tomorrow will show more promise and progress.

Anonymous said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your stepdaughter. As artists we are blessed to have a creative outlet in which to find some solace. Go easy on yourself during these troubled times.